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"The simple answer is that she could not help you because she could not even help herself. One of the most difficult issues survivors of incest have to face is their mother's (or father's) failure to protect them. Although she is not the active abuser, the mother's betrayal may be even more painful to the survivor because of the survivor's conflicting emotions and confusion about the mother's motives and feelings. The first step in healing is to recognize that you survived. Despite the fact that you were all alone, and no one helped you, you survived. One theory is co-dependency. They want desperately to be loved and believe they cannot survive alone. So they endure abuse and the abuse of their children in order to keep their families intact. Codependents are overly concerned with winning the approval of others. Thus they may keep incest a secret because they are afraid of what people may say. One of the major characteristics of co-dependency is denial. They deny reality, pretending that things are not so bad and convincing themselves that things will be better tomorrow. Another theory posited to explain a mother's permitting the abuse of her children is the rejection she felt from her own mother. Having been treated as worthless by their mothers, they become infantile, dependent women who reject their own daughters and permit them to be abused. Although the theories may vary, one fact emerges from them all: mothers of incest victims are also victims. If your mother continues to deny the truth of your abuse, it is because she cannot bear to face her failures and her pain. She may have so deeply repressed what happened to you, along with her own childhood abuse, that she truly does not remember. Her denial may be so strong that she has erased the facts and replaced them with ones she can tolerate." 
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