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"If you've asked yourself these questions, you are not alone. These are the questions most often asked by abuse survivors. We doubt our own memories because we do not want to believe such terrible things could have happened to us. The fact is our memories are real, and we did survive those things. The answer is really simple. No one wants to believe that such horror could have occurred. Our minds naturally protect us from information that is too painful in order to give us time to make the mental adjustments that enable us to cope. Victims of sexual abuse become stuck in the first stage--denial--for many reasons. Betrayal by a parent or trusted friend is in itself so devastating that denial takes over. Abuse survivors experience this denial as adults when they are not yet ready to accept the truth of what happened to them and as children when the abuse is occurring. Adults usually do not have physical evidence of abuse. The injuries inflicted in childhood often heal without visible scars. Several gynecologists explained children heal very easily, and the scars disappear, especially if the wounds are internal. What does it take to convince us? A long process of allowing our minds to adjust to the shock of what we have uncovered. As we begin to find more missing pieces of our mental puzzle, we begin to accept the reality and our denial diminishes. You will find corroboration, when you are ready, from a family member or more likely from recovering a special memory of your own which you cannot deny. Accepting the fact that we were alone and that we survived--and can survive--is the last step in the healing process. In accepting the fact that we now live in a different world is the beginning of a new life." 
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